With two such landmark events occurring within days of each other, I could hardly help but think about how my family is changing. The youngest just started riding the school bus, and the oldest just stopped, but it comes down to the same thing: my kids are growing up, and as they grow up, they are moving away from their parents, finding independence from me.
My children are all pretty close in age, so for ten years running I was always either pregnant or nursing or both. It seemed like I always had one who needed to be fed, one who smelled bad, and one whose nose was runny. They were nothing but a series of hyperactive body openings. During this time, whenever I dared go out in public, I was regularly approached by older women who admired my little flock, then wistfully said, "They grow up so fast."
I got a bit tired of hearing it, because it seemed like a fairy tale to me, wishful thinking that was obviously not true. How could this all be going by so fast, I thought, when it seems like three weeks from breakfast to lunch? I looked forward dreamily to a far-off day when they would all be walking, toilet trained, feeding themselves – even going to school.
And now it happened. It really did. It turned out the fairy tale can come true, and in some ways it does seem like it went by fast. There are things I wish I had done, or done better, while they were little, but it’s too late.
Some months ago, I found my five-year-old studying himself carefully in the mirror. "I’m getting grown up," he announced. "Grown-ups usually have hair in their nose, and I’m getting some."
Oh, if only it were that easy. Growing up involves much more pain and trouble than ordinary nose hair can bring. I'm still working at growing up myself, 40-something years in, and now I'm watching my children try their hands at it, too. And I'm realizing that the hard part may be just beginning. Getting all seven of them safely through their teens should be quite an adventure.
I hope it doesn't go by too fast.
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